Connecting through the aches

They say, Train your mind to see the good in everything, that positivity is a choice and quality of our life depends upon the quality of our thoughts. But when life hits you in the head and knock your knees out, it is a hard advice to follow. And nobody has a sun shiny life. Most of the time, we are struggling and most of the time, we let ourselves be, terribly cynical and harsh. I have read books that advocate law of attraction : like thoughts attract like things but gave up every time life threw a curve ball at me. I guess we make life difficult by choice. We don’t need so many self help books,  therapy sessions etc etc.. all we need is a listening ear. It is a trend these days, to numb ourselves with movies, series, food, games etc. We are absent minded most of the time. Our brain goes on in auto pilot. We accept whatever we catch, negative or positive. Mind can be a friend or a foe, depends upon how we control it. I myself find being mindful, staying in the present moment extremely difficult. 

We are so afraid to feel these days, that we drift  off.  I went through something similar where I thought my life has no purpose and no meaning to it. It majorly emerged from hopelessness. I disappointed myself big time by letting external situations getting the best of me. I let go of my academics, of my health and of my mind. A series of unfortunate events shattered all my hopes and dreams of becoming an independent woman. I did everything to escape the disappointment though. I became egoistic, I binged on not so healthy food and gained weight : a lot of it, spent my days mostly in bed. 

Only one thing that had some interest in my life was music. I started a YOU TUBE channel where I put cover songs n stuff. Now singing without a background track is easy. But with it, is quiet difficult, I realized. My songs were never that musically sound, but it kept me going. In the course of it, I made a new friend. We became friends accidentally as we thought of starting a band, but that didn’t pan out but our friendship did. I was off FACEBOOK, so I just interacted with her. She is a psychology student. Stereotype or not, she did support me a lot to overcome the darkness. Our talks were refreshing. It was not some usual chit chat that we had. We didn’t crush about boys or talked about the latest movie or restaurant. We talked about real issues like loneliness, abandonment, insecurities, forgotten dreams and even death. 

 

Together we enrolled in music class, joined gym and went about our lives. Till day, I am grateful to her for being there when nobody was. We never called each other best friends or BFFS or whatever is the new fad, but that friendship changed me for the better and good days followed once my mind cleared and I could see the world from a different perspective. My final year grades improved, I took break for one year and joined this institute. Real connection is truly priceless. Yes life is all about fun and we should not be judged for indulging in what we like, but at the end of the day, life is meaningless without people who love us without any conditions and accept us just the way we are.